25.6.09
I knew I was going to say that this was too hard for me at some point and that day has arrived.
In class today, I nearly cried and told my teacher that "I cant do this". It was probably the most pathetic I have felt in a long time.
Just the thought of giving up because I was finding something too hard was easy. However the thought of giving up my life's dream and accepting defeat was not an easy pill to swallow. I spat it out.
That second of realisation (that this was my dream and I wanted this) forced me to change and I was able to overcome the obstacle I was having. I performed my scene and it worked. And I did it. I did what was asked of me. Yes, it was hard work. Yes it was difficult. Yes it took something out of me I never knew I had. But I did it.
On the subway home, I was so mad at myself. So mad that even for a second I thought of giving up just because I found something hard and felt I could not deliver what was wanted of me.
I can do this. I will do this. I have wanted this for my entire life. I have sacrificed so much to be here and this is my dream......... I CAN DO THIS!
In class today, I nearly cried and told my teacher that "I cant do this". It was probably the most pathetic I have felt in a long time.
Just the thought of giving up because I was finding something too hard was easy. However the thought of giving up my life's dream and accepting defeat was not an easy pill to swallow. I spat it out.
That second of realisation (that this was my dream and I wanted this) forced me to change and I was able to overcome the obstacle I was having. I performed my scene and it worked. And I did it. I did what was asked of me. Yes, it was hard work. Yes it was difficult. Yes it took something out of me I never knew I had. But I did it.
On the subway home, I was so mad at myself. So mad that even for a second I thought of giving up just because I found something hard and felt I could not deliver what was wanted of me.
I can do this. I will do this. I have wanted this for my entire life. I have sacrificed so much to be here and this is my dream......... I CAN DO THIS!